In light of the fact that It is World Mental Health day today, I thought I would write a blog about loneliness. I remember watching a television program about it some years back and how sad it was to see people alone and lonely. Some were old, some weren’t…
I wonder if it is time we really investigated the epidemic of loneliness, because I genuinely believe that it is not something reserved for those people who are alone. That may seem like a totally weird thing to say but actually what I mean is, that even people surrounded by a huge network of friends and relatives, can feel the isolation of loneliness. They can stand in a crowded room, and hear their heart ache as they can find no face with which to connect. I wonder if the decline of traditional communities is contributing to that and I wonder if it is just because there is so little compassion in the world. People are too short of time to try to connect with others. They already have enough on their plate without taking on someone elses heart ache. Is it that we all feel so misunderstood? Or that no one tries to understand? Is it that people ask “how are you?” and actually have no real drive to know the answer?
I think that Mental Health is so misunderstood, avoided to a point, that this contributes to the loneliness. If you tell someone you feel sad, they say “cheer up”… When actually each emotion is valid and needs to have its moment in your mind. I wonder if this constant drive to “cheer up” means that we just keep putting the lid back on our emotions. We don’t share how we feel and we don’t hold out our hands to help…. And that eventually, there is one tear too many and the mind explodes, along with a breaking heart…. Leaving everyone bewildered and scarred and scared and alone. Misunderstood. Why does it take that long for people to help, and for people to whisper I’m broken?
The very ethos of Bizzie Beans is a way to try to bring people together. Try to get them connected whilst doing things that makes your heart hopeful. Whether that’s running, or art, or reading, or singing. Each is driven by my need to help the lonely. To help bring people together. To help find people a place to heard, to be loved. I suspect that no one really sees that drive behind all of what I do…. But having stood on the outside of normal life I know how cold it can feel, how alone and vulnerable you are and how much longing you have just for some understanding and some acceptance. You don’t need anyone to fix you, or tell you they know how you feel, because we are all different. You just want someone to acknowledge the hurt and make you a cup of tea and serve it with compassion and a cookie. I hate the thought of people being lonely. I hate the thought of loneliness making you ill, and making you lose the will to see the sunshine.
I have lots of ideas to help make the world a kinder place…. I would love to see school children write letters to elderly, would love to take toddlers to sing in old peoples homes! I would love to get all the charities that have a common objective to work together to make a bigger impact! I would encourage people to smile at each other…. To make that connection… To be a lighthouse and help the lost find their way back to belonging!
Look after each other
Love and light
Betty S x